What does self-independence mean to you? Do boys have all the freedom?

INDEPENDENT ….. What does independence mean for you?….. The definition of independence can be different and anything for anyone. For someone it might be traveling when he/she wants, might be fulfilling parent’s dream, might be shopping as many times as the person wants, might be doing a job, and any more the list is endless.

Everybody has a definition of self-independence. What can be the definition of independence for a girl of 18 years who has just completed her schooling? ….

According to me, a girl who lived a life according to their parents for the last 18 years, could be a life where she has the right to make her own decisions and live life to its fullest without any restrictions. Let me be clear in my words through a story.

This story explains the life of two girls in different situations but related to each other,

The first situation

“This girl will destroy all my image. Are we her enemy? I don’t understand Sameera why do you do this? We missed our flight because you were late. We have to attend Montu’s (Sameera’s cousin) marriage….what will I answer my sister (Sameera’s paternal aunt) ?…….yelling and shouting Mr. Sharma (Sameera’s father) in anger. Sameera in extreme frustration saying nothing and Mrs. Sharma (Sameera’s mother) trying to cool the situation. Mr. Sharma thinking of ways to reach Ajmer to attend the marriage ceremony.

The second situation

People are enjoying a concert with the amazing band group led by Tiyasha, Manav, Amrit, Rahul. Tiyasha’s voice has just mesmerized people over there. The concert was over… people were appreciating the band group. The group went home early as the next day since they had to visit Ajmer by their own bus for performing a band show in Montu’s marriage.

So, here are two girls Sameera and Tiyasha heading towards the same destination but in a different situation.

Let’s move forward with the journey …….

Montu calls Amrit asking them to give a lift on their way to Sameera and her family as they have missed their flight. Amrit being the senior of Montu agrees.

The next day very morning Sameera and the Family were waiting for the bus, soon Manav driving the bus comes near Sameera’s house and they picked them up.

Mr. Sharma was very uncomfortable with the bus because he saw Tiyasha with three boys alone. Also, they were drinking, smoking, or speaking slang languages.

He was very upset but with no option left he has to bear them.

Sameera was sitting in a corner silently.

After some time they stopped at a Dhaba for a break, they all had breakfast but Sameera hasn’t eaten or drank anything since last night.

Her mother insisted but she refused as if she was angry at something. Then they started the journey.

On the bus, Tiyasha was having Riyaz ….Mr. Sharma’s Phone rang but the voice was not audible because Tiyasha’s Riyaz was disturbing him. Mr. Sharma says “Please stop this noise for a while”, Tiyasha stops.

After the call was over Tiyasha asks Mr. Sharma his favorite song and asks him to sing. Mr. Sharma enthusiastically starts singing and it was horrible …

Tiyasha beautifully continues the same song and says Mr. Sharma “If you do not know about the music you have no right to call it a noise”. Mr. Sharma being embarrassed keeps quiet.

After some while, they stopped the bus for a break. The whole group member was outside .. Sameera and family were inside the bus.

Please explain to your daughter Mrs. Sharma …why is she doing so? What will they think that we are her enemy? Why is she not talking to us, not eating- in front of them. Why is she embarrassing us? …shouting Mr. Sharma at Sameera.

Not able to hear this more Sameera ran out of the bus and goes some far …sat down and started crying loudly. Seeing this Tiyasha and the rest band group came near her asking was she ok or not?.. Why is she crying? ..

Sameera asks  Tiyasha “Is your parents the same ?.. My parents are taking me to Ajmer because Montu’s parents and my parents have selected a boy for me to get married to. Tomorrow is my 18 birthday. If I was a burden to them and  I had to be married at the last why have they educated me?”.

Tiyasha told Sameera “Why don’t you run away? Or just fight for yourself?.

Sameera replied “I tried …I ran away to my friend’s house yesterday that’s why we missed the flight but then I remembered my mom’s face and came back because I can’t see her crying. I also left food for several days, cried but it’s of no use now so I have given up and will accept everything that will happen to me. My dad instead of thinking about me…He is thinking about society? This hurts me the most ” Sameera was crying till then Mrs. Sharma came and took her back to the bus.

Tiyasha and the rest band group were so sorry about Sameera and they just wanted to help her in any way they could.

Finally, they reached Ajmer and everyone was busy with Montu’s marriage. At night the band show was to be performed. Everybody was enjoying the band show which was amazingly performed by the band group. After the band show, Tiyasha and Sameera’s mother were sitting together.

Here’s the conversation between the two which changed Sameera’s mother’s mentality.

Sameera’s mother:  “ Are you married ?”

Tiyasha:  ”No… And I am not married yet because I haven’t done “

Sameera’s mother: “ What about your parents? They must have insisted you get married?

Tiyasha: “ Yes yes .. of course. They are my parents and will want to get me married but I will marry only when I want to and with the one, I want to marry OR I might not marry ever.

By the way, has disaster befallen because I didn’t marry? You got married …Look at yourself.”

Sameera’s mother: “See Tiyasha it’s not like that as you are thinking. Mr. Sharma thinks and takes care of the family.”

Tiyasha: “ He doesn’t allow you or Sameera to keep their advice, decision, or interest and he takes care of the family? Really???”

Sameera’s mother: (Changing the topic) “Who all are there in your family?”

Tiyasha: ” Mom, Dad, and an elder brother.”

Sameera’s mother: “Ok that’s why. At least they have someone to look after them. That’s why you can work.”

Tiyasha: ” My brother lives in the US with his wife and children. My mom and dad live in Delhi. And my brother hasn’t come to India in 2 years.”

Sameera’s mother: “How much do you earn?”

Tiyasha: “Around 2,50,000 a month and I take care of my parents because I can do it. Sameera can also be and take care of yourself if you allow her to do otherwise she will live a life like you.

Tell me something from your heart, what you really want to do?”

Sameera’s mother: “I want to go away for two days where I don’t have to do anything, think anything just alone with myself.”

Tiyasha: “So do it, who’s stopping you?”

Sameera’s mother: ” How? I have to look after my husband and Sameera too. Who will look after them?”

Tiyasha: “You can’t even do such a small thing by your wish. Soon Sameera will also become like you.”

On the other hand, Sameera’s father (Mr. Sharma) was getting humiliated by his sister and brother-in-law as the family which they have chosen for Sameera to get married have asked a lump-sum amount for dowry which Mr. Sharma was not able to arrange.

Sameera asked Tiyasha that for one last night I want to be like you. So, with Mrs. Sharma’s permission  Tiyasha and the band group went to a room ….Sameera wanted to be away from her parents and live her life. They were enjoying music and dance, and also Sameera was crying a lot.

Mrs. Sharma went to her hotel room seeing Mr. Sharma sitting alone and thinking. He asked Mrs. Sharma “Are we doing right ?”…Mrs. Sharma replied, “Can I say something from my heart ?…. Let this society go in hell.”

The band group has left early in the morning with their bus. After going some distance they saw Mr. Sharma was standing on the road asking for a lift to return. They stopped the bus and guess what he was not alone Mrs. Sharma along with Sameera was returning back. This was a new morning for Sameera. She could live her life on her own.

Ending this happily ended story I just wish there could be more Tiyasha in this world.

Thank you.

If you have any such experience or opinion on this, do comment below.

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